5 Tips for Surviving The First 8 Weeks Of Motherhood

I will never be one of those bloggers...hell one of those women that will ever try and act like motherhood is easy. 

Being a first time mother undoubtably is the hardest job I ever have and probably ever will take on. While it does get better as the weeks and months roll on, those first 2 months (8 weeks) are stressful enough to break even the strongest super woman in us all.

So having experienced everything from an emergency "induced" labor, to a hospitalization just days after being sent home with my baby to breastfeeding complications, postpartum anxiety and more. 

I feel like I've survived my fair share of new mom woes and im just qualified enough to let you know the best ways to push through the first few tumultuous weeks to and get to the other side.

5 Tips for Surviving the First 8 Weeks of Motherhood

1) Lean On Your Village

This is number one for a reason y'all.

It can be so hard (especially as women) to lean on those around us. We often think of ourselves and the ones that will save everyone else...but trust me.

Sometimes we need saving too and as we journey into motherhood this will continue to be important and it's especially critical in the first few weeks. 

Everything is new to you as a mom, what to expect, how to manage time, how to care for this little one it's all like a foreign language to new mom's especially while sleep deprived and delirious.

So lean on your village. 

One really helpful thing to set up before you have your baby or even after is a Food Train. This is when friends or family work together on a rotating basis to cook or provide food for you in some way. This is super helpful because finding time to eat let alone cook is hard in the first few weeks.

Anywho...the take away here is reach out, ask for help, ask for advice, take the help that is offered.

2) Get Help

In the last point I talked about getting help from your village. 

But this is about getting PROFESSIONAL help.

As someone who sees a therapist on at least a bi-weekly basis, let me be the first to say there is no shame in seeing/talking to someone about all the things that are going on in your life and internally in your head. 

Dealing with the stress, the physical changes and sleep deprivation that comes with becoming a mother is tough and sometimes it's even harder to identify if you may be struggling with things mentally, especially if you're not familiar with the symptoms. 

Thats one of the biggest reasons your obgyn has you fill out a questionnaire at your first few appointments after having your baby.

It's easy to slip into depression, anxiety or just a bad headspace after birth...toss our fluctuating hormones on top of it and it can be a recipe for disaster.

If you are feeling overwhelmed, sad, angry, scared or even emotionless can all be signs of postpartum mood disorders.

As someone who personally suffered from postpartum anxiety and depression, i'm telling you it worth it to just have a conversation with someone. The feeling you experience don't nave to be fact and there are ways to cope. 

Don't let anything you can change take away from your time, happiness or memories you can create with your new family.

3) Release the Pressure to be Perfect

The biggest mistake I made in the first few weeks?

Attempting to hold on to perfect.

I did this with everything...from Savannahs outfits, to her Christmas pictures and from breast feeding to Savannah hitting milestones and more. 

Now ask me how many of those things were perfect...

NONE!

Savannah was born almost 4 weeks early so her fitting into all of those perfect outfits I purchased was out of the question. She actually didn't fit new born clothes for almost 3 months. Those Christmas pictures? She cried straight through my photo shoot for her. 

The there way breastfeeding...

That was our biggest struggle of all. Savannah was diagnosed with having a tongue tie which prevented here from latching properly. Then because of my hospitalization 3 days after giving birth my milk supply all types of off (which I didn't even know). 

When we combined those you two factors what did we ended up with? A baby who was not pooping for almost 2 weeks, rapidly dropping weight and becoming malnourished because she was literally not taking in enough milk to sustain herself. 

So my perfect exclusively breastfeeding journey quickly turned into ER visits for a baby that was slowly slipping away and emergency formula supplementation.

But stories are never perfect right?

It killed me that I couldn't have things exactly as I wanted but...such is life. When I started letting go of perfect...I became a better me.

Let go of perfect sis.

4) Get Away

Look...this one ain't that deep.

Mamas need time to relax, regroup, unwind, hell...sleep!

And being your babies everything 24 hours a day is hard. 

Don't feel guilty if you need to give the baby the dad, the grandma, your sister whoever to get some time to yourself.

Take a long shower, go get your nails done, pee in peace, get a massage. 

Do you boo.

Remember, you can not pour from an empty cup. 

In order to take care of those around you, you need to be well and whole. So be your best self for your baby by taking some time to care for you.

P.S don't let anyone make you feel like you are a bad mom for taking time for yourself.

5) Love on Your Baby

Last but not least...

LOVE ON YOUR BABY!

As stressful as motherhood is, as crazy as you can feel as a new mom and as confusing as this whole journey can be...

It. Is. Beautiful.

It has been proven that laying with your baby, snuggling and showing your little affection can help not only regulate their heartbeats and calm them but it can improve your mood.

Plus there is nothing more addicting that new baby smell.

So with all that being said...

Remember the days may seem long but the years are short and you will never get these moments back.

So enjoy every high and low.

Until Next Time, 

XO Deanna